You know those trees that are all twisted and distorted? You know why they look like that? It’s because they started growing under STRESS. And they’re trying to make their way THROUGH the stress, up to the light.
- Prince Ea
We all know people with twisted beliefs and behaviors. Instead of trying to understand them we try to push them apart or isolate them. This usually makes situations even worse.
Some examples of twisted behaviors:
- Bullying
- Avoidant personality
- Narcissism
- Terrorism
The list goes on.
Kids bully others for several reasons. But all those reasons have one thing in common. They are trying to make up for something they are missing from their life. The same goes for narcissism as well.
People with avoidant personality may be trying to shield themselves from getting hurt. They might have faced negligence from their caretakers, got hurt from somebody they love, or experienced some trauma in the past.
Have you noticed kids trying so hard to get some attention? Who doesn’t need some attention, right? When kids don’t get enough of it, they might go to extreme limits to claim the attention they deserve. These behaviors later turn in to what we call “twisted”. Attention seeking is one of the causes of twisted behavior.
No. People with twisted behaviors are not always evil or lying. They might not even be aware of their behavior in their conscious mind. Our subconscious mind is hard-wired with a lot of coping mechanisms for survival. When it perceives a threat in any manner, it activates a mechanism to defend against it. This is why there are people claiming that they have been attacked by aliens. They are not lying!
Understanding is the first step to fixing these people. Instead of scolding a bullying kid, if we can find out what they are missing from their life and assure it to them, the kid will get better. Instead of bombing terrorists, if we can solve their problems, they will drop their guns. If you can make an avoidant person understand that love doesn’t always hurt, he might get better.
Aren’t we all twisted in some way?
Let us try to understand people better!
